We were overlooking my favorite view of Midtown Atlanta on top of a hill, we were only a month or two in too dating, which is hard to believe was 9 years ago. I told him about my heart for adoption, something that was incredibly important to me. And although neither of us were sure exactly where we stood on growing a family, it was something I asked him to be open to.
Fast forward 5 years later, 4 years into marriage and we felt the call to start growing our family. So we talked to a few adoptive families and took the first step. I was dealing with numerous health issues and while biological kids were not really on our radar, we weren’t even sure I would be able to have one.
Well if you are on this blog you probably already know how this turned out, a frequent story: we were in the paperwork process with an agency and I was absolutely having an emotional breakdown. It was post 2019 LOVE ATLANTA which is a big project push for me, I was on B12 shots because my levels were critically low, and I had just run a completely horrible Peachtree Road Race after the past year of a breakout. I felt all over the place and just completely outside of my normal which could have been attributed to so many things. It was almost like a nudge from the Holy Spirit to take a pregnancy test or it would have never been on our radar, but alas Elijah made his triumphant entry into the world 9 months later. At that point we put our adoption conversation on hold to revisit in another season.
Fast forward to a little over a year ago, right before Elijah turned 2, and we felt the nudge to pick it back up. This time not starting with a specific ministry but instead looking at all our options with an incredibly helpful adoption specialist. We waffled between foster care and adoption feeling like our home could be a safe and Jesus centered place for whoever needed place to lie their head AND we weren’t necessarily considering an infant which is where so many people start. Our heart feels led towards little ones that don’t have as great of a chance of adoption. Not easy to say the least and it’s been an emotional roller coaster for the past 7 months since we finalized our home study. We received situations, not really knowing if we would get a “halo moment” when we felt we should submit our profile, and after a few months of feeling in limbo we prayerfully started leaning towards the foster care system.
We said yes to two cases and never had one kid enter our home then a series of situations we couldn’t say yes to due to having three ‘dependent on us’ lives in our family (when it comes to violence or aggression our dogs can be as much or even more so at risk than our 3 year old and that matters deeply to us), and emotionally with the places God has called us in other areas of life during this season, I cracked. I felt wrecked and overwhelmed and so we closed our home.
So here we are almost 1 year exactly to the day we started the first documents picking adoption back up. We’ve submitted for two cases and where we are at the moment is delicate and I feel hopeful I can share more soon. I have a lot of feelings, we have learned SO much, we stand trusting the Lord even in the moments that feel like a deep hole. I have so much more respect for families who have sat here before, and I’m thankful for the community around us! Even if we never get placement, and instead we get to help care and lean into other people’s stories and families (which we are 100% content with if that is God’s story for us) we know this season wasn’t for not. It has grown our minds and our hearts – it has helped us learn the heart of Jesus so much deeper. Gosh, He loves His children so much and His broken-heartedness in some of these dark places is so tangible sometimes. And if a deeper love and care for people is all I get in return of this season isn’t that so so worth it?!?
In the messy middle,
If you are at all interested in supporting us financially I’m posting the link here, but no expectation from us here! http://adopttogether.org/families/the-woodson-s